I Gave My Teacher Detention, And Learned About Grace | Episode 414

I Gave My Teacher Detention, And Learned About Grace | Episode 414

Ever feel stuck replaying a mistake until it steals your momentum? We open with a concrete win—30 episodes in 30 days—then get honest about what really sustains that pace: shrinking the gap between noticing an error and fixing it without beating ourselves up. I walk through how we plan monthly and quarterly, why short-term adjustments support long-term goals, and how a few safeguards—checklists, second looks, and after-action notes—keep us from making the same mistake twice.

Along the way, I share stories from school detentions that now make me laugh. They’re not excuses; they’re reminders that growth thrives on humility. Humor helps restore perspective, especially when perfectionism tries to take over. We talk about building resilient processes that learn from tests and near-misses, much like engineering teams do: collect data, protect against the known pitfalls, and keep iterating. The goal isn’t to avoid failure forever—it’s to fail smarter and recover faster.

Mental health remains the throughline. A phrase I brought from group therapy anchors the conversation: “Right now, you are safe and you are okay.” That present-tense check calms the nervous system and makes room for action. When a fix requires time outside your control, acceptance reduces anxiety and keeps you focused on what you can do next. Pair that with compassion—for yourself and others—and you get sustainable output, better decisions, and less burnout.

If our mission resonates—reaching more cities and countries while amplifying voices—join us. Subscribe, share the show with a friend, and leave a review with your best lesson from a mistake you turned into progress. Your stories fuel this community and help us help more people.

Chapter Markers

0:00 Welcome And Big Growth Milestones

2:53 Strategy: Short, Medium, Long Term Goals

5:08 Ruts, Resilience, And Process Fixes

9:13 Data, Testing, And Not Repeating Mistakes

13:15 Compassion Over Self-Criticism

18:45 Shortening Time From Error To Action

24:20 Personal School Stories And Humility

45:10 Laughter, Perspective, And Imperfection

51:20 Grounding: Safe And Okay Right Now

#TeacherDetention #LearningAboutGrace #LifeLessons #StudentExperiences #RespectAndUnderstanding #GrowthMindset #EmpathyInEducation #ConflictResolution #PositiveDiscipline #InspiringStories #justiceforsurvivors #VoicesforVoices #VoicesforVoicesPodcast #JustinAlanHayes #JustinHayes #help3billion #TikTok #Instagram #truth #Jesusaire #VoiceForChange #HealingTogether #VoicesForVoices414

Chapters

• 0:00 Welcome And Big Growth Milestones
• 2:53 Strategy: Short, Medium, Long Term Goals
• 5:08 Ruts, Resilience, And Process Fixes
• 9:13 Data, Testing, And Not Repeating Mistakes
• 13:15 Compassion Over Self-Criticism
• 18:45 Shortening Time From Error To Action
• 24:20 Personal School Stories And Humility
• 45:10 Laughter, Perspective, And Imperfection
• 51:20 Grounding: Safe And Okay Right Now

Transcript

Justin Alan Hayes, Voices for Voices: 0:02

Hey everyone, it's Justin here with Voices for Voices. Thank you so much for joining us on this episode of the Voices for Voices TV show and podcast. If you can do us a big favor and hit that subscribe button, give us the big thumbs up, like, follow, share, uh, reach out to 25 of your closest friends, family, or followers, let them know about the Voices for Voices, TV show and podcast. We would greatly appreciate that. Uh it's been a uh just a real amazing time here at Voices for Voices. Uh we just we just completed uh obviously the end of the year. We're we're past that. We've gone over those analytics, but we we just passed yesterday uh dropping 30 brand new episodes of the show in 30 days. So uh guess call it uh a 30 for 30. Uh so we're uh very uh surprised uh because we just we just go to work and and that's what we what we do when and we help people and it's uh you know to take a step back and and see uh numbers like that, 30 and 30, 30 brand new episodes uh in 30 days. And again, you're looking at the the administrator as well, so not just uh you hosting uh the majority of the shows, uh, but also getting them ready to be posted uh out to the world so you and others can watch and listen and uh be part of the Voices for Voices family, which is growing by the literally by the minute uh we we are reaching a lot of people. Uh we're uh one of the big goals we have just in general, is we're reaching at least a hundred countries and territories. Uh, our big goal is to reach uh at least 300 countries, territories, not provinces. And right now we're reaching uh thousand and eight, I believe, uh cities worldwide. And I don't see a reason why we we can't be reaching 3,000 uh cities worldwide. And with your help, uh I know we can do it. It's something free to do, to share, uh, like, subscribe, and uh we would uh greatly appreciate that. Uh so today was another another day, another strategy session to see where we're at, uh what um what the you know the the following uh rest of the the the month, but not just the month of January, you know, we look at things monthly and then quarterly, so that just means you know there's 12 months in a year, and so quarterly, so that would be there's four quarters in a year, so we just take a total of 12 months divided by uh four for the four quarters, and then that that takes us to three months. Uh so uh we we had a uh pretty robust strategy session on uh where we're at, where we see ourselves in the short term, the medium term, and then the the long term. Uh and it it just keeps it and I know I use this word a lot, it keeps amazing us, keeps amazing me. Like the the the Lone Star song, you know, amazing, and he's talking about an individual. Um and I'm talking about individuals too. We're just amazed at the traction that we're picking up and we have picked up as this small small bite-sized organization, and we just continue to uh continue to to drive forward. Uh we we just do it. Uh there are times that are easier than than not. Uh and those times that they're not, uh, you know, for instance, there was a period of time where there might have been, I think, two, maybe even three weeks where we were kind of in a rut where it felt like we weren't making strides forward, no matter how small of strides uh forward that uh we were looking to make. Uh and it seemed like we would never get out, never get out of those ruts. Um and it is uh wow. Um, and then to come out on the other side, those are the thoughts that we try to remind ourselves that first off, we know nobody's perfect, we know that, and and so we just need to get it out of our heads, and I'm talking about myself, uh where I just have to get out of my head that there's gonna be times where we're we're going to have to stop, revisit something, potentially fix it, and then move forward. And I don't know anybody on the planet that doesn't have to do that from time to time. Um, and I'm even thinking of you know Elon Musk and uh testing the rockets and and uh landing them back uh on ships and uh there are tests that go very well, and then there's tests that go very well, but there might be some pickups along the way, but they're collecting that data and that that information so that when they go on to the next the next test that they're able to utilize what they've learned in the past or even as in the present, that going forward, they're able to go, okay. I remember when this happened, or we need to protect against this. Doesn't mean that no again, it doesn't mean that there's gonna be no mistakes, uh, but we just try not to make the same mistake twice. And that's that's the same thing for me. Uh they try to not make the same mistake twice. Have I? Yeah, yeah, I've made the same mistake twice. Uh the goal is not to, but we're we're human beings, so we're not perfect. So there are gonna be times that no matter how hard we try, that we're we're gonna fail, or we're not gonna meet the goals that we set out to, but there's gonna be times when not only do we meet those goals, but we surpass them. And it's those times that we sit back and look and say, alright, this is worth it. It's very much worth it what we're doing. Because as we talk to our most recent guests, and just about every guest we have on, it depending you know how the how the conversation goes, you know, we we we talk about that of you know we we can only do the best that we can. And when when we mess up, when we screw up, whatever words you want to use, I mean it doesn't this is something I've learned over time. It doesn't do a whole lot of good to uh look at something we messed up on and to dwell on it. Now have I done that? You bet you, I have. I've done that before, but it hasn't done me any good when I when I do that. When you know I can't get that out of my head that what what I did is like, oh Justin should have known, should have checked that, you know, that second or third or fourth or whatever, however many times. But guess what? Because we all make mistakes, sometimes the mistakes we make others may not see. And so sometimes it's not as bad as what it uh seems to be. And again, so to to go to go back on uh uh some of my reflection, you know, we could spend a day half a day, an hour, whatever the amount of time. We could spend an amount of time going, oh, we screwed up, we're the worst. Instead of just taking that time to go, okay, what did we mess up? Okay, yep, we we're acknowledging it, and uh we're putting an implementation, like a fix. How do we fix this? Uh, so we can get get things rolling in the process, because uh a lot of times there's a process that goes after the fix comes in. So we go, okay, did we want to screw up? No, do you want to mess up? No. But it doesn't matter. We just want to make sure we're not dwelling as much as we could, and that's where I really found myself trying try not to dwell on on those inefficiencies or things to do wrong or that I could do better, or things I should have been able to see or hear, and go, oh Justin, why didn't why didn't you why didn't you know that? You knew we knew this from before. So by talking about this on the show, it's another reminder to myself as well as to our viewers, our listeners, anybody who follows us, that we all make mistakes, no matter how much we want to pretend that we don't. We all do. We do. And it's okay. It's just when we we we re we realize that we've made a mistake, or something in the process just doesn't feel right, and we go, oh, okay, we should have done this step before that step, or whatever, whatever the thing is that needs fixed, is to shorten that amount of time from when we notice it to when we actually just get down to act fixing it. Because yeah, we can just we can just go off on everybody, we can go off on ourselves, uh Justin, like I said, should have known, should have known, should've known or somebody else, but it doesn't do any good. It's like alright, we're human. What do we need fixed? How do we fix it? And let's fix it instead of throwing in extra time where we're name calling, where um we're talking down. Doesn't do anything, doesn't doesn't do any good for anybody, especially the mental health of the person that messed up, because don't you think that the person that messed up already feels bad enough? I already know like when I screw up, I already feel bad enough that somebody brings it up and wants to harp on it and go on on and on and on. Is to treat others, especially ourselves, with compassion. Because again, we already know if we if we screwed something up, we already know it. Once we find out, we know it. Like, all right, Justin, bang on it. Why'd you do that? Oh, because I wanted to. Well, we know that's not the answer. It's uh it just being facetious. So why why stress on it? Let's just find find what needs fixed, find what needs moved around, whatever, whatever that thing is, let's just find it and and and let's again shorten the time from name calling, yelling, uh, we get we get it's inconvenient. We know it's inconvenient, it's inconvenient to everybody. It's inconvenient to everybody's mental health because somebody can be like, you know, name-calling and that, and so that's not good with the mental health of you know, talking down and all that, and then the person or persons that made the mistakes, you don't think they already feel bad about it, and it's like, all right, you know, I wish I wouldn't have screwed up or messed up, whatever the word is, made a mistake. We all make mistakes. Uh and I think the big learning is again to shorten that time from once we notice that there's a mistake to when we actually fix it. And then again, there might be a process after we fix it that's out of our hands, meaning I could fix something and submit it, wherever that may be, and it may be three or four days, or maybe a week, or or more. But at that point, there's nothing we can do. We've already done our piece, we've already identified what was what went awry, what what do we need to do to fix it, let's fix it, let's get it submitted, and and let's just do things that way. Um that's something that I've I've had to come across for my own self is to be compassionate. We talked about this on many shows, but it's so important, that's how we talk about it. To be compassionate to not just others, but to ourselves because we're human as well. And the easy thing to do, what's the easy thing, easy thing to do? To just go off on ourselves and Justin, you shouldn't have done this, Justin this, Justin that, Justin, Justin, Justin. We could do that, and then maybe feel good about ourselves, like, oh, I told myself. I know it sounds super um uh extreme, I guess, maybe in a way. Uh but it happens. And there's nothing we can do about the after the after the mistake, the thing is done, it's wrong. There's not a darn thing we can do as far as what what we did. I mean, the worst feeling in the world to me is when I find out that I made a mistake or did something wrong. At that very instant, that is probably the worst I feel. And so anything after that that I say to myself internally or I don't know, uh people they tuck themselves in the mirror, I don't I don't know, and go, hey, you know, we gotta get this, we gotta get this ironed out and fixed. Well, no kidding. But we don't need to we don't need to you know take it to those levels where we're just telling ourselves or telling others, you know, that oh, well, should have known, should have done this. It's like, no. Mistakes are gonna happen, it's alright. Let's just fix it and move on. There's not a darn thing we can do. We'd be it there's just not. We just have to look at what's the most efficient way, the best way, the uh well also Putting those double checks in there just to make sure that, like we said, that how do we fix this? How do we pre prevent as much as possible from this happening again, especially back to back? Like something happens, we mess up, you know, now, and then you'll and then if it's five minutes later, then it's like, okay, we just need to take a step back, and let's maybe maybe work on something else, maybe work on nothing for a period of time. That's that's what I'm talking about, because we could still be clouded by that negativity if we're still talking down on ourselves or others. Yeah, you know, it's easy, easy to uh you know say like you said, just you know, talking down is one of the easiest things to do, call ourselves names and uh say, well, this is why this, this is why that. It doesn't. And it it and it's easy to say. It's easy to say this, right? So it's easy for me to share on a show and say this. But something very recently did happen, and so by talking through it, I'm helping myself get more grounded and share. And I'm sharing on the show. And maybe you have a show, or maybe you have things that you do that help you uh take a step back. Whether it's working in a journal, maybe playing video games. I I don't know what that is for you. Those are those are things that you do. Uh but it's okay to do that. It's okay. It really is. The world's not gonna end because uh I made this mistake. We're just gonna again identify it. How do we fix it? Let's fix it. You know, maybe do like an after-action report. Not that that has to be more work. I'm thinking more of whether we have to write something down or just in our mind that we're saying, okay, if we're doing this thing three times a month, then each of the three times a month that we do this thing, this process, this topic, we might want to go a little bit slower, even though it's easy to go, oh, we're so close, we're so close, we're so close. Because that's how I mean that's how I feel like oh, we're so close, and sometimes and get like it's so close it's we're like, we're so close, we're so close. It's like uh when I was in in school, they would call it like senior itis. So you know, that last couple weeks of school, uh our minds as students were on vac on summer vacation, uh that it's like, all right, well, we got two weeks, we got one week, we got two days, we got one day. And uh it's interesting. So here's uh here's a story about that. When I was oh where was I I was in I was in middle school and again I was still in the the years where I I don't know. I I I just wasn't doing a the best job uh being a good student, or not even just being a good student, but it's being a a student that could just sit there and not have the you know be the I don't know class clown or what and my um my mom worked at the school that I was at that I was going to and it was the last week of school and one of the ways we would we could get punished was you know depending on the severity and all that. Um I mean I I and I'll do the fighting and all that. I I'm just more of like I that that's just not me. I'm just more of the I don't know where I was, you know, the like the talker, and so I have that saying of like if you don't want anything nice to say, don't say it at all. Well, I could have heeded that advice uh that during many times, especially those times. So it's the last week of school before Christmas Christmas, before summer break here in the United States, and I was in class, and again, my mom worked at the school, so she was at work at the school, and one of the again, one of the last so they let's just say there's five days left in school at some point and probably like the second or third to the last day, meaning that there was only like two days maybe left in until we'd be out for the summer break. Um again, my mom was at work, I was at school, and of course I I had to run my mouth about something, and did I need to do it? No. I I think I would I I think looking back, I think it had a lot to do with my insecurity of myself, and that I was looking for some kind of I don't know, validation or I something like that. And so I couldn't keep my mouth shut and I ended up in detention. It was either the last day of school or the second last second to last day of school, and part some some of the time that uh so school would end, and and if if I was I couldn't drive, it was in middle school, and if I didn't want to take a bus home, most of the times I I would I would ride with my mom to and from school. It just made sense. We're going to the same place and both ways. We're we're going to school and then we're going home. And some of the times I would after school would end, my mom would still be working a little bit longer, like either half hour, an hour longer. And many of the times I would be playing, I would go down to the gym while I'm waiting for my mom to finish, and I would just you know play basketball, just you know, practice shooting, foul shots, and layups, and just and so that's what I would do. It kind of pass the time, and so it kind of helped me practice because I was playing sports at the time, and some of the times I didn't. I was in detention, which it did, it depends on teacher to teacher. But this teacher, it was after class after school's over, you go to their classroom, and you have to like sit there in the class for that hour or 45 minutes or whatever the time may be. Um I mean, we didn't have phones back then, so it wasn't any, it wasn't something like now, or it wouldn't be like, okay, you can't use your devices, can't use your phones, or uh that it was just okay, you're gonna come sit here for half an hour, an hour, and and this is what you're gonna do. Well, I told my mom uh that I was just gonna go down shoot baskets. Well, I wasn't. I was going to the one of my teachers' room in detention because I I think I racked up oh, what was it? I think it was three, three detentions in a row. I don't know if this was at the same part of the year. I just remember uh it's been so many years. Oh my gosh. Uh so I would I would try to hide it, right? Like any any kid, you know, trying to hide it from their parents because it didn't want your, you know, I didn't want my mom to know that I'm gonna be in detention because then it's automatically gonna be like, well, why were you in detention? And it's like, because I said this, and then why did you say that? And I was like, I already know I did something wrong, I'm sorry. Uh so anyway, so I was in detention. So I I'll get to the how many after the this this part of the story. Um just bring back memories. Oh my gosh. Uh and and so I think I like put my head down to sleep, or I don't know, just the past on the desk, just past the time in detention. The the one I'm referring to is the last week of school, and the teacher left a room for I don't know, 10 minutes, 20 minutes, came back, and I was the only one in there because right, yeah, there's not supposed to be a lot of people in detention. People are supposed to be good, follow the rules, be kind, and not be not nice and say not nice things. Uh and and so at this time, when the teacher had left the the room, he must have gone down to the office where my mom was working and and talked to her and said, Oh yeah, your son's in the in in detention, and and he's in my room, my classroom. So on the ride home, uh my mom was like, so it came up. It was a topic of conversation. You know, at first I was like I was like, I can't. At least I was somewhat smart where I didn't try hiding it and hiding and hiding it. Like I wasn't stupid because I was at the same school where the teacher and my mom were at the same, we're at we're all at the same school, and it's not like that he had to walk, you know, miles and miles to get to where my mom's office was at. And so my mom, we got into this discussion, me and my mom, and uh, so there was, it was either the second to last day of school, or it might have been the last day of school. Like it's the last day of school, and you found yourself in detention, and uh so there's that um of uh you would think I wouldn't learn. Um but the other thing I was oh my gosh, I got oh, I got a couple I got I got two more. It I got unfortunately I got store stories for a lot of different things. But this is the stuff like it makes right now it makes me chuckle and laugh looking back. Like it wasn't like I didn't put anybody in danger, I didn't it wasn't any of that. It was just talking back and not saying nice things, and it was didn't mean that I was any better than anybody else. Um it it didn't mean that at all. It it it just meant that uh yeah, I I you know I didn't I wasn't causing a ruckus or or anything, but the same teacher, and I think this was earlier than this last week of school with the last detention with saying, Oh, telling their mom they're playing basketball when they're actually sitting in my room in detention, Mr. Hayes, and um so that's what he called me. So uh so that that other time thinking with this same teacher, uh it was looking back, it's it's I don't want to say it's hilarious because it's not I I'm not I'm not condoning bad behavior and talking, I'm not at all. But for me, having my mom working at the same school as I'm going to, like it, you would think I'd have an incentive not to run my mouth and all that, but be that as it may. But a different part of the year, same teacher, I started whatever whatever I was talking about, uh, and I I remember the teacher, and he had this this this distinctive voice, Mr. Hayes, and I was like, oh no. He goes, Mr. Hayes, I'll see you. That's one detention. And then I kept talking, right? You'd think I would just like zip it. But I would like I would not actually zip it, but just like stop talking. And I was like, and then I said something else, and then and then he goes, that'll be two detentions, and I think I got up to three in a row. Uh so I could laugh at it now, not at the time, and I don't I don't condone this heck activity. Um that's what I'm trying I'm keeping what the what what the conversation and and and that was uh it it it was it was just me not being a uh as as kind of a person as I as I should have been. And then we'll leave we'll leave the show on this this next this next part here. So there's another teacher, same same school, I think might even might even have been the same year. Uh and she came in the I don't know if she would always sorry my eyes water in here with this light and my allergies. Uh if you're listening, obviously you're not gonna see this with 10 people watching, and that's what I'm doing. I'm rubbing my eye, trying to make it stop watering, and uh okay, so there's this other teacher. Okay, now I'm gonna try this one. Oh my gosh. This is so funny. Uh to me it is. Uh so another teacher, so she would come in a little bit late, uh not not very late, but she would uh you know, when the bell would ring, you know, she would wait out for all the students to come in, and sometimes she would get in conversations with other teachers, and or she was gonna go maybe like if we were having a quiz or a test, she might be down getting picking up the copies from the office, and and um you know, she would have different versions of the tests and quizzes, so it would deter cheating and copying off of somebody else. And so um anyway, so one of these days, one of those days, let's say, um, because it's not these days like now, many, many years ago. Uh she was doing what she was doing, the teacher. And I do not condone any of this activity at all. Uh I was the one time we had, um, I don't know if anybody's been to like a sporting event, you know, they do the wave from time to time where you know one area stands up and waves their hand up, and then you go around and around the stadium or the arena, and uh so one of the times like we were doing that, or like I had I got that started, and like I think I was sitting maybe in the middle, and so she'd be writing on the the board, and then people would be doing the wave and going, whoa, whoa, whoa. Uh and she's like, What's going on? What's going on? Uh so I think I got an attention or something from that. Uh But that that wasn't the real the the what I think of right now. I think of her coming in a class late and I'm like I'm gonna give I'm gonna give it give my teacher a a detention for being late and so you know my fellow students they're like no you won't you won't do that and I'm like oh you don't think I will and it and and so I was like alright you don't think I will so I did so I I knew it's drawer because I d I see you know sometimes sometimes teachers would make it official that you're in detention and sometimes I wouldn't so some of them would fill out the paper and then they would file that with the office and and all that, and then you were supposed to get it, I think, get it signed, I think, by a fan, you know, by your mom or dad or your guardian. Um and others didn't, and so the ones that didn't, of course, I those were the ones I was trying to like not not really share with with my with my mom and and that, and then ultimately with my dad. So I did. I I wrote up the detention uh on on the paper. It's like uh it was like the three colors or things like the yellow, white, and pink, and like you know, the the student got a copy, the teacher got a copy, and then I think a copy went to like the main office. And uh so yeah, I I did that, and I I I gave her a detention because I left it on her desk, like with a pen for her like the sign. Um and I don't I don't think I I don't think I put my name, and so then it was the whole who did this, and then I'm just sitting there, you know, like wasn't me, I didn't do it, and then of course, then it gets into like well if nobody's gonna tell, like, well then everybody's just gonna be in detention, and so then at that time they're like, Justin did say like Justin, I'll see you after class. I'm like, no, because she was a stickler of uh filling out the paperwork and and all that, so uh trying to have you know some uh lighthearted conversation. Were these good things to do, good habits to have? No, absolutely not. Uh I shouldn't. I I I I shouldn't talk about shouldn't have talked back to their teacher, I shouldn't have talked down to anybody or make somebody uncomfortable with talking about I don't even know. Um so I don't condone it, but these are things I did. I was a kid once. Um so I just thought I would share that uh because sometimes sometimes, you know, re reminiscing even though it was not the the best these weren't with the best things. Um yeah, I'm laughing and I'm and I I apologize for laughing. I apologize to the teachers that um if they're watching or listening, uh that I you know made lighthearted comments about uh you know the the class and the detentions. Uh but every once in a while we just have to laugh. And and so this was my way to kind of round out you know this episode of talking about like we all make mistakes. Let's just try not to let's just try not to harp on them or take too much time restating the obvious that there was a mistake. Like we know, and we're not happy, we didn't plan to do it, it just happened. And and and so that that's kind of the the the first message, and then the second is obviously some years later, obviously, this is more than 20 years later, uh, but you know, we find we're gonna find ourselves maybe laughing or just having a quick joke and uh not not that we're laughing at people, I'm laughing at myself. I'm not denying that I didn't put myself in these situations and and get get detentions. Uh I mean on on I mean I wasn't in the in detention every single day of the year. Uh but there were some times I was, and yeah, and and and so I I just I don't know, just thought I could maybe share that and maybe make somebody laugh and chuckle or be like, yeah, that you know, he's not perfect, and that and that that's been my whole point. This whole whole thing, 400 and 10 plus episodes is when I say that I'm not perfect, I don't think I'm perfect. I'm not trying to show that I'm perfect, I am not perfect, and that's the other layer of what I just shared. That I'm not perfect, never was, never will be. And so we don't need to beat up on ourselves, talk down on ourselves. That's the easy thing to do. That's the very easy thing to do, just to say, oh, well, yeah, screwed up again. That's the easy thing to do. The little bit tougher thing to do is to go, okay, made a mistake. There's not really a whole lot I can do about it. There's gonna be it need to be some fixes. Uh could be minor fixing, could be uh very in-depth fixing. Uh nonetheless, there you know, we need we need to do some fixing. But that's okay. It's okay. It really is. I'll go back to my very first group therapy when I came out of the hospital in November 2017. I mentioned this in my book, The House of You Prescription for Living, where I was literally just coming out of basically out of the valley of what seemed a sure death, and I was I was having a very hard time. A really hard time. And this gentleman is our uh one of our art instructors. And there was there was one day lunch would be like right after who would have his class. And one day, like I I literally just needed I just needed somebody to talk to. And I said, I I guess I'm okay. I guess I'm I'm alright. And he says, he goes, he goes, yes, at this very moment, you are safe and you are okay. That doesn't mean in the future, doesn't mean it whether a second from now, uh an hour from now, ten years, twenty years, doesn't mean that there's not gonna come a point where you're not, but right now you're at the hospital, so the therapy was held at the hospital. Um and and so he said, You're seeing the psychiatrist every day, you're seeing the nurse monitoring your blood pressure, because I was one of the medicines I was I was on, I was worried, like I was worried about everything. That my blood pressure would either be too high or be too low, or uh would have too much of this vitamin or too low of that vitamin, and and I was just like those things have eight years later have carried with me that when I go through like my my evening prayers, that's one of the that's one of the things I recite to myself. Like, you know, like right now, Justin, you're safe and you're okay. It's not saying, again, not saying that in a second or in an hour or in ten minutes or two minutes or a month. Not talking about that. We're talking about this that this is where the grounding comes in of what use is a gonna what use is it if I get upset about a mistake that I make or somebody else makes? It's not gonna do a whole lot of good because all I know is right this second I'm safe and I'm okay. Like I might not even get to the point to be able to see whatever the mistake was to be fixed. Like, so why am I why would I be worried about that? I hope that makes a little bit of sense. 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