The 10 Biggest Myths About Social Media Success | Episode 174

The 10 Biggest Myths About Social Media Success | Episode 174

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What if your perception of success and happiness has been shaped by a mirage? Get ready to uncover the hidden truths behind those picture-perfect social media posts and the silent struggles that never make it to your feed. Today, we promise a candid conversation on how platforms like Instagram and Facebook create a landscape where unrealistic standards thrive, spurring unhealthy comparisons with others. We invite you to challenge these digital facades and understand the deep-rooted disparities between glossy online images and the authentic stories of personal and professional growth.

Join us as we discuss the role of experience in shaping success, whether it's the journey of seasoned companies compared to startups, or the evolving careers of veteran athletes contrasted with rookies. With insightful anecdotes, including the career paths of notable NFL quarterbacks, we emphasize that true success often stems from years of hard work, patience, and perseverance. Tune in for an eye-opening exploration that encourages you to appreciate your journey, honor your unique path, and embrace the learning and growth that come with time.

Exploring the impact of social media on self-perception, this episode delves into the comparison trap that many find themselves caught in. We discuss the importance of experience, the value of small victories, and how to break the cycle of feeling inadequate.

• Examining how social media influences our self-worth
• The significance of experience in personal and professional growth
• The mental health effects of continuous comparisons
• Acknowledging the value in small accomplishments
• Understanding burnout and the importance of persistence
• Reflections on growth and continual learning

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Transcript

Justin Alan Hayes: 0:00

Nobody said that life is easy, although if you look at social media Instagram, facebook, snapchat, youtube, rumble, social media in general you'll the beach to warm climates, to sunshine, do perfectly time, do perfectly airbrushed or modified photos, everything just looking almost almost perfect. And while we know many of us know that that's not the case, that's not reality. It's hard when we have the phone in front of us what seems like 24 hours a day, seven days a week, all year long, and we do a lot of comparison of where what we perceive the, say, the online community, people we don't even know, celebrities, just average people that we still don't know. Some we may, but a majority we don't. As we're looking through our social media feeds and it's really what I'm finding, it's hard, it's hard not to compare where we are, where I am, with others, and so that can be other individuals, that could be other organizations, other companies, organizations, other companies, and doing that comparison, well, look at this person, look at this organization. It looks like day-to-day, year-to decade to decade, that there's no trouble pulling in funding sponsorships and what we fail to look at, especially from has a ton of experience in a particular field, or a company that has been in business for 10, 20, 30, 100, 150 years 10, 20, 30, 100, 150 years and so when we do our comparison, we're not really comparing the apples to apples. We're not comparing 10-year experience versus 10-year experience, that there's fluctuations. Another way to think about it is when we look at, again just comparing where we are as individuals, as as family members, whether that's financially, whether that is by, say, how many homes, how many cars, how many trips it's a particular family member, members or parents that they are able to do, and we're again not comparing that apples to apples. Right, parents are more experienced, older, have been through a lot of, a lot of different things that we as the children, nephews, grandchildren, haven't, haven't been through, and so we're not making that comparison again to where we're at is at the same spot as where a family member is.

Justin Alan Hayes: 6:32

Bringing it back to the first part of today's show, is we look at an organization, a company? They've been in business 100 years versus a business that's been in around, incorporated, for two years, three years? Big difference. A lot of things change over time. Economy goes up, economy goes down. There's good times, not so good times. There are just a lot of different things that the more experience we we get as an individual, as a student, as an apprentice, as a rookie.

Justin Alan Hayes: 7:29

Look at the pro sports. Rarely do players come right out of college and make huge impacts. They might do very well, but sometimes it takes a year or two or three. We look at football and quarterbacks. Quarterbacks at the top of their class get drafted and they may spend many seasons learning, studying, watching the starting quarterback at their and their team. You know I can think of right. We had Brett Favre and with Aaron Rodgers you know there was some time that had elapsed there was Tom Tom Brady and Jimmy Garofalo, and so those are just two examples to share.

Justin Alan Hayes: 8:54

And it's important that we have these conversations, even if it's in our heads and our minds, because no matter how wonderful, how photo, a video, anything is and we compare it to ourselves, we're not going to be somebody out there or another organization out there that has had more experience, experience, been around longer, been able to grow customers for 10, 20, 30, 40, 50 years, whereas an organization is less mature, meaning just younger, and in years they're going to be reaching out. We're going to be reaching out to individuals who, a lot of them, already have their mind made up per se of who they're gonna do business with, and individuals, individuals. The same thing, when we look at you know a, an organization that has employees, and and individuals tend to fare a lot better if they know somebody at that organization. And that's word of mouth, that's just that's knowing A friend of a friend, a friend of a family member, gets you that foot in the door. It gets your resume, your profile, seen by the actual decision maker, your resume, your profile, seen by the actual decision maker, or if there's more than one decision maker, and that's another thing that's hard to do in any job market.

Justin Alan Hayes: 11:43

Looking for new, new role, you know, joanne fabrics, they can have some pretty, pretty dire news they're filing for bankruptcy again. Unless the organization has purchased everybody, from staff in the store to the staff in the office, they're out of a job. And so how do you like that, after the holidays, coming in to work or logging in remotely, virtually, to find that out, and then, oh, by the way, there's no severance pay. That, oh, we let you know last week what was going on. And so the fact that we're allowing you, uh, to work the next six weeks, that's, that's your severance. Yeah, that's, that's uh, that's a situation that people, uh, have to have to work through, and people have significant others, they have families, they have children and, as we know, bills. I think it was a Destiny's Child song back in the day bills, bills, bills, bills. They keep coming, like the one at Joanne Fabrit has occurred, or whether even promoted and doubling your salary, the bills are bills and the bills want to be paid. It's it's. It's that simple.

Justin Alan Hayes: 14:03

So, as we step through the first part of 2025 and we look at how easy it is to compare ourselves to others, how easy it is to compare ourselves to others, how easy it is to take a conversation, a on the surface and below the surface makes us feel not only the comparison, but not worthy. I guess, in a way, right. The more times we go after something, a job, an opportunity, and for for that, those opportunities, those things not to happen the way we envision in our mind, it hurts. It hurts as just a human being, and having to go day to day to continue on is something that's very, very hard to do. We talk about Actually referring back to one of my recent conversations that you saw with Life Warrior United, mark McAdams, and we talked about how and we talk about how difficult sometimes it can be to get a shower to brush our teeth.

Justin Alan Hayes: 16:31

Little things, little things that we think are little, that we think other people think are little. Yeah, we think they're just minor, small things. Well, on the surface they seem to be. For anybody that's going through any type of difficulty, it's hard to do. There's quotes and comments galore Out. Pick yourself up by the bootstraps and keep going. And again, that's one of those, one of those quotes, those comments. That it's. It's much easier said than done.

Justin Alan Hayes: 17:36

Uh, because when we sometimes look at ourselves as not needed, not useful, not helpful enough, it's not that we're not helpful, we're not useful, helpful or not useful, it's that we're not helpful or useful enough because if we were, we would be in a different spot. We would have made it past this hurdle, in that hurdle, in this situation, in that hurdle in this situation, in that situation, and talking the way I we're talking in this episode sometimes, I think even still, it gets frowned upon. You know, we're talking about touchy-feely things, empathy, feelings, and those aren't exciting, and those aren't exciting and those aren't masculine and and so we still want to talk about these things because there are still people that are watching us, listening to us, that are going through hard times. We're going through hard times as an organization, as an, as an individual, of what's next, what, what else can we do? How can we help people, how can we continue not only to help people, in a way, prove it to people, to groups that don't see it or don't believe it? And it's very, it's very, it's very hard and that can lead to a lot of things, burnout being one of the one of the big things. Because, right, we're focusing on one thing, two things, three things, four things. We check off those four boxes and then we continue going on. Then we look to an opportunity, look to an opportunity, whatever that opportunity may be, and if that goes well, then we're able to breathe a sigh of relief for the time being.

Justin Alan Hayes: 21:21

If it doesn't go well and this is the part that I think is really hard when it doesn't go well, when we don't get the thing, we don't get what we're searching for, again, it doesn't mean we're not helpful enough. That we're not useful enough, it means that at this point, in this particular situation, doesn't mean in all situations. It just means in this situation, we have to look elsewhere, we have to keep going. And so those four things that we, you check those boxes out. Well, we got to feel, and, speaking from experience, the way I feel useful is by not by just, but by doing things completing tasks, filming content, sharing it with with you, whether you're you're watching this for 30 seconds or you're watching it for the full episode, whether you've been with us from the beginning or you're tuning in and this is the first episode and that you've made it through 20 plus minutes because maybe some of the things that we're talking about, maybe maybe that reflects a little bit of somebody you know. And, at the end of the day, I think we want to help people, whatever that might look like for you.

Justin Alan Hayes: 24:05

Something and this is where sometimes we get, we get tripped up myself is we think that helping somebody, a group of people, has to be some grandiose thing away, and it doesn't have to be. But, just as I'm sharing this with you, in my mind, I feel that is the case where to make a big splash, a big impact, that we, I need to make a big splash to get people to get attention in a positive light, so that that situation that we talked about, you're checking off those four boxes or those four things, and then going after an opportunity and getting not great, great, great feedback that it's the small things that keep us feeling useful. And so what do I do when, for whatever reason, I don't you know I look many years back and then I look at where I'm at, where we're at from my perspective and my perspective, and by you know some of the, some of the decisions I've. I've made a ton, a ton of sunk cost that I just paid, because this is a thing, this is gonna make the impact, this is gonna help us get to that, helping three billion people over the course of my lifetime and beyond. And we hear the cost of doing business, that we have to put the work in. We have to put the work in, and so when I do these tasks, I feel like I'm putting the work in, I feel like our organization is putting the work in, and so we have that to be very grateful for.

Justin Alan Hayes: 27:21

Very grateful for, because it's easy to give up, it's easy to say you know what we tried, we gave it our best and leave it at that. However, is that really what we want to do? And these are all thoughts that go on and in my mind, potentially your mind. Should I continue? Should we continue, uh, going down this, this route? We're just not. We're just not cutting it, we're not not getting to where we would like to be, to those comparisons of other people, other individuals, other organizations that have a lot more experience at what they're doing and what they've done, and so we call that. You know, we're bringing things back to zero. We're just looking at here's where we are. Here are the fantastic things we have accomplished and here are things that we're going to continue to accomplish, and so there's excitement's excitement, there's fear, there's being unsure. What do we do? Do we continue doing not, and just know that we have some of the same thoughts and concerns as many people. So until next time, we'll see you later.